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http://auburnpub.com/lifestyles/ten-tips-for-interacting-with-a-person-with-a-disability/article_81fb10d3-df68-58bb-8891-e2a17f388cce.html Let’s face it: Disabilities make people uncomfortable. If you do not regularly interact with someone who has a disability, it is easy to feel like you might say or do the wrong thing. Perhaps you have run across that small percentage of people with disabilities who snapped at you when you offered some assistance. No one wants to feel like they are walking on eggshells. So, here are Options’ top 10 tips for interacting with a person with a disability: No. 1: Do not refer to a person with a disability as “handicapped.” This literally means “cap in hand,” as in looking for a handout. People with disabilities are regularly made to feel that they have to make up for their disability in some way. People-first language identifies a person with a disability as a person first, and defines the disabled part after the fact. No. 2: Speak directly to the person with a disability, not their attendant, unless otherwise directed. Even when speaking to a person who is deaf or hard of hearing, you must talk directly to that person, and not an interpreter or attendant. This will allow the person with the disability the dignity to be directly involved in the conversation, not relegated to the sidelines. No. 3: Do not assume — ask. If there is a need to sign something or make any other decision, ask the person with the disability if they can or want to do the task. A very high percentage of people with disabilities are very capable of signing their name or mark, as well as making decisions for themselves. No. 4: Speak normally; do not shout or simplify your language, unless directed to. Often, people will assume because you are blind or in a wheelchair or displaying some other obvious physical disability, that you are also hard of hearing or simple-minded. No. 5: Do not be afraid to ask questions about how to assist a person with a disability. Ask “would you like to take my arm?” if directing someone who is blind or vision-impaired. Ask “can I hold the door for you?” to someone in a wheelchair or using a walker. No. 6: If you are with a child who asks about a person they are seeing who is disabled, let them ask questions; don’t quiet them. The more children are comfortable with people who have differences, the better off we all are. No. 7: The terms “mentally retarded” and even “mentally ill” are not widely used, and better language would be “intellectual or developmental disability.” The word “retarded” needs to be permanently retired, as does all language that denigrates a person for his or her physical or mental differences. No. 8: It is OK to express empathy, but sympathy is off-putting to a person with a disability. The difference is not to express pity, such as “you poor thing.” Acknowledge challenges positively. No. 9: Do not discourage an activity that a person with a disability wants to engage in. As long as everyone is safe, allow the opportunity for the activity through reasonable accommodations. If a person in a wheelchair wants to play basketball, encourage that through methods that allow him or her to play. No. 10: Always treat a person with a disability the way that you would like to be treated, if you were disabled. The most effective way to be more comfortable interacting with people with disabilities is to treat them as you would anyone else, just being conscious of their particular needs. Life is a journey, and we all are learning how to treat one another along the way. Psychologist Dr. Phil is frequently quoted as saying, “You teach people how to treat you.” One of the key components of advocacy is education. We at Options are grateful to The Citizen to have a voice in our community. It is through combined efforts that the independent living philosophy is advanced.